heebeejeebies

I've got the heebeejeebies.

Whenever I think about it, my hands get really cold.

All I can think about is actually the day I'll receive my SPM results. Way to think forward, Atikah. I swear I'll cry a hell lot - good or bad, the waterworks are going to be bad bad BAD. I cried for 30 minutes straight when I received my PMR results and they were actually good marks!I cried even before I got my results. So yeah. I'm not very confident about this exam. Not very. Most of my exam results are just so-so and the only thing I'm actually confident in is - well, duh - English and I guess, EST.

I really wished SMSU does Gerak Gempur and you know, a bunch of other papers. The other kids in Kajang actually did lots of exam papers. Lots and lots. They spell - security. But no. Shitlah SMSU. I'm really really worried of my Science Papers. I haven't got an A yet. Shit shit shit. My subjective answers and essays suck.

The other day, I was in my English Lit class and we did this mock-exam thing. I got a B. Ferk. I gotta score my English Lit. I mean, I might pursue it for my career, you know. I might be doing Arts! For some reason, I'm excited - I think I would love to be an Arts Student. My mum's friend is actually a lecturer in UM for English Literature and she explained the works. I feel as though the ball is already rolling. And if I'm doing Masters, I could go to England! And then get my PhD. And become a freaking English Literature professor yo! haha.

Oh man. I would never thought've myself as a teacher.

Well, a lecturer but you know, same shebang.

Class dismiss? haha.

And the irony is that the papers I'm really struggling with are Science papers. I'm not even going to use it. Geez. Ah well, at least Physics is out of the picture - if not I'm seriously gonna blow up. Life's like that.

-- yo gonna make me lose my mind up in here up in here. haha. how cacat can i get?