Jealousy Is I

You wanna know how I got my name? I think I'm sort of obsessed with it. Anyways, one particular day, when my parent's was flipping the baby's name book, they spotted Atikah. And they thought, 'Hmmm...this one?'. And with the mighty power of The Above, the phone rang a few minutes later. One of my close aunts and called with an idea for my name - 'How about..Atikah?'.

And so, with all the weird dejavu-ness, my name is Atikah.

And after a few researches, I found out the real meaning about my name. Tons of it actually. My name was used by this Arab woman ages ago. She married 4 times or something and all of her husbands died before her. Hmm... That's reassuring, for sure. One of the bad things about my name is that I am a person that could get jealous.

My jealousy, though, doesn't induce me to a murderous psycho killer who stabs everybody that seems too perfect. No, mine is like cancer. Eating me up slowly. Sometimes I don't even know if I'm depressed or just being the normal me. I'm jealous of your fair skin. I'm jealous of your brains. I'm jealous of your nice body. I'm jealous for the fact that people get taken with you while I have to take time to actually know them. Jealousy is part of me. The part where I couldn't fulfill but only gawk and admire.

I am jealous.

I am Atikah

-- No, I do not want your comments for this.